Now that the 5th is getting closer I am starting to get more scared of going. I fear that they will take Ryan away from me. Everyone ensures me that they won't but that little voice in the back of my head that constantly tells me that 'You are a bad mother', or 'You are going to drop him' keeps telling me they are. So am I doing the right thing by going?
I really am tired of crying. One thing I am proud of is, I have not cried myself to sleep since February. So without medicine or a therapist I have made some improvement. But I still question myself, am I doing the right thing?
I really, truly, am scared....
You need to stop listening to all these people who talk crap to you - that's verbal abuse and you don't deserve it! Make sure you state at the beginning of your session, that you aren't remotely tempted to abandon or hurt your child or yourself (if true) and that you have an in-house family support system. Any other area where right-wing troglodyte conservatism isn't taken to an extreme as it is here, this would not be an issue though.
ReplyDeleteCan you talk to your son's pediatrician, your clergy person, someone like that, to have an authority figure on your side in case the therapist does try to get judge-y?